You’re So Lucky!
Leila was a high achiever. She had learnt that in order to survive; in order to be loved by her family and in order to be accepted in the workplace, she had to produce desirable results.
Her long list of accomplishments often evoked an emotional “You’re So Lucky!” response from new acquaintances, which made Leila cringe as she raised her eyebrows in disagreement to say “Oh, yeah? Really?!” She was superstitious and desperately afraid that her apparent good fortune would be jinxed by the overt envy or covert jealousy of people that neither cared for her success nor her well-being.
In order to ward off the bad luck that she was expecting, sooner or later, she would justify her apparent good fortune with a long list of sacrifices she had made along the way. She would highlight all her failures and sigh over her dreams that would never be fulfilled.
Leila believed that she was far from being lucky; in fact, she was convinced that her inability to settle down with the man of her dreams, and her numerous failed romances meant that she was cursed and that her life was cursed.
Subscribe to free Success Newsletter to read the story of Leila’s journey from a life of fearful pessimism to a lucky life of blissful contentment. Perhaps you will see a reflection of your own journey in this story.
Ms Jesvir Mahil
www.jesvir.com
December 2009, London, UK
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Social Media & Serendipity
Can social media increase serendipity in your life?
What is social media? And what is serendipity?
As you are reading this article, which is an example of social media, you will, no doubt, have your own interpretation of this form of modern communication. In my view, social media refers to the communication of thoughts, ideas, concerns and interests through a network of connections in which many can and do, correspond.
Serendipity is a word associated with a fairy tale called “The Three Princes of Serendip” in which the heroes possessed the gift of making fortunate discoveries by accident.
Thus, another way of asking the above question could be:
Is it possible to increase the likelihood of making fortunate discoveries by coincidence through engaging in social media?
In my opinion, the answer is obviously “yes”, based on a few possible reasons:
1. In many good fairy tales, the hero or heroine delves into the unknown where they find the treasure which is invariably much more wonderful than anything they had ever expected to find. Likewise, the social media heroes and heroines step into the unknown whenever they express the contents of their mind to an audience that is largely unfamiliar and unpredictable in how they will respond to the communication. As in fairy tales, there is usually (but not always) a reward for the courage it takes a social median to share openly in a public environment where not everyone is friendly or supportive. This reward may take the form of new friendships, greater self-confidence and ability to influence. The gift of serendipity will be apparent in how these new experiences unfold, perhaps through the depth of trust created or the quality of collaboration made possible.
2. Social medians seem to know and understand the value of FREEDOM and they generously give away their best thoughts, ideas and systems for FREE. Unlike journalists that may feel compelled to sell their articles to the highest bidder, social medians generate articles that are not necessarily written to please anyone, let alone be sold. It seems apparent that the person whose life is entrapped with obligations and restrictions will have limited opportunities for random, creative acts of serendipity whereas those living in freedom will attract more opportunities in which the gift of serendipity will reveal itself.
If you have the courage to share your creative ideas openly and you value freedom so much that you give generously, at random, you are creating a lifestyle that is perfectly conducive to acts of well-deserved “serendipity”.
I have been developing my skills as a social median for many years with my websites, blogs and active participation in online forums. Over the years, there have been various cases where I have been blessed with serendipity. For example, I used to write quite a lot for a coaching forum and one day, out of the blue, I was asked to write a chapter for a book called “Good Question”. This was many years before I published my own books and perhaps it was a signpost, guiding me along my career path as a writer, which is not at all what my focus was at that time, when I was contributing my ideas to the coaching forum.
How much of a social median are you? Do you share your ideas, thoughts, concerns and interests with people that you may never meet in your lifetime?
What is the impact of your thoughts on others? What evidence of serendipity have you seen in your life recently? How could you cultivate your environment to attract more luck into your life?
© Jesvir Mahil
Subscribe to Success Newsletter
Can social media increase serendipity in your life?
What is social media? And what is serendipity?
As you are reading this article, which is an example of social media, you will, no doubt, have your own interpretation of this form of modern communication. In my view, social media refers to the communication of thoughts, ideas, concerns and interests through a network of connections in which many can and do, correspond.
Serendipity is a word associated with a fairy tale called “The Three Princes of Serendip” in which the heroes possessed the gift of making fortunate discoveries by accident.
Thus, another way of asking the above question could be:
Is it possible to increase the likelihood of making fortunate discoveries by coincidence through engaging in social media?
In my opinion, the answer is obviously “yes”, based on a few possible reasons:
1. In many good fairy tales, the hero or heroine delves into the unknown where they find the treasure which is invariably much more wonderful than anything they had ever expected to find. Likewise, the social media heroes and heroines step into the unknown whenever they express the contents of their mind to an audience that is largely unfamiliar and unpredictable in how they will respond to the communication. As in fairy tales, there is usually (but not always) a reward for the courage it takes a social median to share openly in a public environment where not everyone is friendly or supportive. This reward may take the form of new friendships, greater self-confidence and ability to influence. The gift of serendipity will be apparent in how these new experiences unfold, perhaps through the depth of trust created or the quality of collaboration made possible.
2. Social medians seem to know and understand the value of FREEDOM and they generously give away their best thoughts, ideas and systems for FREE. Unlike journalists that may feel compelled to sell their articles to the highest bidder, social medians generate articles that are not necessarily written to please anyone, let alone be sold. It seems apparent that the person whose life is entrapped with obligations and restrictions will have limited opportunities for random, creative acts of serendipity whereas those living in freedom will attract more opportunities in which the gift of serendipity will reveal itself.
If you have the courage to share your creative ideas openly and you value freedom so much that you give generously, at random, you are creating a lifestyle that is perfectly conducive to acts of well-deserved “serendipity”.
I have been developing my skills as a social median for many years with my websites, blogs and active participation in online forums. Over the years, there have been various cases where I have been blessed with serendipity. For example, I used to write quite a lot for a coaching forum and one day, out of the blue, I was asked to write a chapter for a book called “Good Question”. This was many years before I published my own books and perhaps it was a signpost, guiding me along my career path as a writer, which is not at all what my focus was at that time, when I was contributing my ideas to the coaching forum.
How much of a social median are you? Do you share your ideas, thoughts, concerns and interests with people that you may never meet in your lifetime?
What is the impact of your thoughts on others? What evidence of serendipity have you seen in your life recently? How could you cultivate your environment to attract more luck into your life?
© Jesvir Mahil
Subscribe to Success Newsletter
Monday, December 14, 2009
Read Effectively & Efficiently
How well do you read? Notice, I didn’t ask “How fast do you read?” I asked quite a different question: “How well do you read?”
Like me, you may have wished you could read much faster than you do. There may be a growing pile of books on your shelves, gathering dust; books that you wish you had time to read; books that you wish you could read faster, to fit in the time you have available.
What’s stopping you from reading your collection of books? Is it really time and are you sure you are such a slow reader? Perhaps you are mistaken and it is in fact, neither of these two reasons.
For most of my life, I held the belief that I am a slow reader. I didn’t bother to clarify who I was comparing myself with until I met an expert photo reader recently and I realised that I could read as well as him, if and when I wanted to. In fact I realised that without being able to read effectively and efficiently, I would not have been able to study for and pass all my exams from the basic GCSE level to several degrees including an MBA. This was quite a revelation. It freed me from the desire to attend quite expensive “speed reading” or “photo reading” courses.
Ask yourself: “What is my belief about my reading skills?” “Who am I comparing myself with?”
If you believe that your friends, colleagues and bosses, read much better than you, what are they doing differently? What is it that you are not doing? Are you following effective reading strategies?
Here are a few that I use:
Strategy 1
Environment: Make sure you are physically comfortable and that you are able to breathe properly. Curling your legs up on the sofa is a great position for falling asleep but it will not serve you so well in reading effectively. Your abdomen needs to be free of obstructions to take in a full breath of air, regularly. Also, your back needs to be well supported so that you won’t be interrupted from your reading by continuously having to change positions.
Position the book upright on a reading table so that you are looking at it in the same way that you look at a computer screen (not laid flat on the table). If the book is laid flat on the table, notice that your eyeballs will not have as much peripheral vision as when they are focused straight ahead. When you are driving a car, you rely on peripheral vision to be aware of what is happening to your left and right. You would not be a good driver if you looked down the whole time. Similarly, you will be a much better reader if you look ahead than if you look down.
Strategy 2
Purpose: Make sure you know why you are reading the book. Start with a very clear intention. What are you looking for? Entertainment? Information? Inspiration? The more specific your purpose, usually, the easier it is to decide if the book is meant for you. If your purpose is to find relevant information for an assignment or article that you need to write, effective readers usually scan the contents page; the titles and subtitles until they find what they are looking for. If your purpose is to get a general sense of the book, to help you decide whether to buy it or not, for example, you will naturally skim through the pages to see if it interests you. This does not mean that all books you have bought are meant to be read by you. Your purpose may not have been clear when you bought the book; or that particular purpose may no longer be relevant. There is a time and a place for everything and when you decide what your purpose is, you will know whether the book is meant to be read now, or in fact ever, by you. This strategy may well clear some of your dusty bookshelves and make room for those special books that really deserve your attention in the present.
Strategy 3
Read the book with your mind rather than your eyes: Your mind is full of knowledge and all the new information it receives latches on to the existing knowledge in order to make sense of it. Therefore, the more well-read people tend to read much faster, being able to recognise and make sense of a lot of material they have not previously seen and they use their previous knowledge to predict what the author will express. When you are reading with your mind, imagine that you are having a conversation with the author of the book and this could give you insights that are not apparent in the physical words that you see with your eyes. Our favourite books are often those in which the author speaks to us with underlying messages that are triggered when there is a connection between the mind of the author and the mind of the reader.
If you use these three strategies effectively, you are no doubt, an effective and efficient reader and you will continue to improve as your mind learns to recognise familiar language patterns; familiar themes; familiar content. The more organised the existing knowledge in your mind, the greater the likelihood that the new information will be easily assimilated and integrated to enhance your comprehension skills and your ability to communicate your understanding. So, what is your current belief about your reading skills?
I learnt some of these reading techniques from the following:
Buzan, T., (2003) The Speed Reading Book , BBC Worldwide Ltd, UK
Websites:
PhotoReading Whole Mind System Reading Program
http://www.photoreading.com/ (accessed 12 December 2009)
The Speed Reading Coach
http://www.thespeedreadingcoach.com/ (accessed 12 December 2009)
If you enjoyed reading this article, please share it . To receive notification when I write another article, subscribe to our newsletter here: http://universityforlife.com/subscribe.htm
© Jesvir Mahil 2009 www.jesvir.com
How well do you read? Notice, I didn’t ask “How fast do you read?” I asked quite a different question: “How well do you read?”
Like me, you may have wished you could read much faster than you do. There may be a growing pile of books on your shelves, gathering dust; books that you wish you had time to read; books that you wish you could read faster, to fit in the time you have available.
What’s stopping you from reading your collection of books? Is it really time and are you sure you are such a slow reader? Perhaps you are mistaken and it is in fact, neither of these two reasons.
For most of my life, I held the belief that I am a slow reader. I didn’t bother to clarify who I was comparing myself with until I met an expert photo reader recently and I realised that I could read as well as him, if and when I wanted to. In fact I realised that without being able to read effectively and efficiently, I would not have been able to study for and pass all my exams from the basic GCSE level to several degrees including an MBA. This was quite a revelation. It freed me from the desire to attend quite expensive “speed reading” or “photo reading” courses.
Ask yourself: “What is my belief about my reading skills?” “Who am I comparing myself with?”
If you believe that your friends, colleagues and bosses, read much better than you, what are they doing differently? What is it that you are not doing? Are you following effective reading strategies?
Here are a few that I use:
Strategy 1
Environment: Make sure you are physically comfortable and that you are able to breathe properly. Curling your legs up on the sofa is a great position for falling asleep but it will not serve you so well in reading effectively. Your abdomen needs to be free of obstructions to take in a full breath of air, regularly. Also, your back needs to be well supported so that you won’t be interrupted from your reading by continuously having to change positions.
Position the book upright on a reading table so that you are looking at it in the same way that you look at a computer screen (not laid flat on the table). If the book is laid flat on the table, notice that your eyeballs will not have as much peripheral vision as when they are focused straight ahead. When you are driving a car, you rely on peripheral vision to be aware of what is happening to your left and right. You would not be a good driver if you looked down the whole time. Similarly, you will be a much better reader if you look ahead than if you look down.
Strategy 2
Purpose: Make sure you know why you are reading the book. Start with a very clear intention. What are you looking for? Entertainment? Information? Inspiration? The more specific your purpose, usually, the easier it is to decide if the book is meant for you. If your purpose is to find relevant information for an assignment or article that you need to write, effective readers usually scan the contents page; the titles and subtitles until they find what they are looking for. If your purpose is to get a general sense of the book, to help you decide whether to buy it or not, for example, you will naturally skim through the pages to see if it interests you. This does not mean that all books you have bought are meant to be read by you. Your purpose may not have been clear when you bought the book; or that particular purpose may no longer be relevant. There is a time and a place for everything and when you decide what your purpose is, you will know whether the book is meant to be read now, or in fact ever, by you. This strategy may well clear some of your dusty bookshelves and make room for those special books that really deserve your attention in the present.
Strategy 3
Read the book with your mind rather than your eyes: Your mind is full of knowledge and all the new information it receives latches on to the existing knowledge in order to make sense of it. Therefore, the more well-read people tend to read much faster, being able to recognise and make sense of a lot of material they have not previously seen and they use their previous knowledge to predict what the author will express. When you are reading with your mind, imagine that you are having a conversation with the author of the book and this could give you insights that are not apparent in the physical words that you see with your eyes. Our favourite books are often those in which the author speaks to us with underlying messages that are triggered when there is a connection between the mind of the author and the mind of the reader.
If you use these three strategies effectively, you are no doubt, an effective and efficient reader and you will continue to improve as your mind learns to recognise familiar language patterns; familiar themes; familiar content. The more organised the existing knowledge in your mind, the greater the likelihood that the new information will be easily assimilated and integrated to enhance your comprehension skills and your ability to communicate your understanding. So, what is your current belief about your reading skills?
I learnt some of these reading techniques from the following:
Buzan, T., (2003) The Speed Reading Book , BBC Worldwide Ltd, UK
Websites:
PhotoReading Whole Mind System Reading Program
http://www.photoreading.com/ (accessed 12 December 2009)
The Speed Reading Coach
http://www.thespeedreadingcoach.com/ (accessed 12 December 2009)
If you enjoyed reading this article, please share it . To receive notification when I write another article, subscribe to our newsletter here: http://universityforlife.com/subscribe.htm
© Jesvir Mahil 2009 www.jesvir.com
Sunday, March 01, 2009
Dear Friend,
It is already spring, a time for new beginnings and reflection on innovations. What innovations are you working on in your life and business? What are you thinking & doing differently this year? How are your thoughts, perceptions, behaviour and understanding of the world different to last year; last month; last week?
Over the course of this year, I will be sending my readers sample chapters of my new book "How to Rock the Boat ... Safely!" which I am publishing as an e-book in the first instance. I would love to receive your comments and feedback on each of the chapters so that I can make amendments as necessary for the paperback copy. Please click on the link below to read the first four chapters.
How to Rock the Boat ... Safely!
It is already spring, a time for new beginnings and reflection on innovations. What innovations are you working on in your life and business? What are you thinking & doing differently this year? How are your thoughts, perceptions, behaviour and understanding of the world different to last year; last month; last week?
Over the course of this year, I will be sending my readers sample chapters of my new book "How to Rock the Boat ... Safely!" which I am publishing as an e-book in the first instance. I would love to receive your comments and feedback on each of the chapters so that I can make amendments as necessary for the paperback copy. Please click on the link below to read the first four chapters.
How to Rock the Boat ... Safely!
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